Is anybody else noticing that articles about etiquette in social media are jam-packed with common sense tidbits such as: “Ask about other people” and “give compliments frequently”?
I suggest that if you really want to know how to behave on Facebook or Twitter, pick up a copy of Dale Carnegie’s How to win friends and influence people. Cheaper than a subscription to Fast Company, seriously.
If you haven’t read this American classic, you should. You’ll love the retro “can do!” Sinclair Lewis vibe. And once you’re done reading this book you’ll be so amazing on Twitter that FDR will offer you a cabinet position!
Dale Carnegie, Social Media Expert
It’s no surprise, every Twitter guru will remind you: “Promote others more than you promote yourself”. Mr. Dale Carnegie was all over this concept decades ago.
Tips from his chapter: Fundamental Techniques in Handling People are: “Make other people feel important” & “Give honest and sincere appreciation”. By the way, this book was written in 1936.
That’s not all… Carnegie was also a social engagement guru! Six Ways to Make People Like You includes “Talk in terms of other people’s interests” & “Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.”
This is game changing advice. Do you think we could dig him up for TED2010?
Most of Carnegie’s chapters are filled with mini case-studies: the territorial salesman who became number one in the country, the stenographer who used the book’s techniques and was promoted, the town clerk who became senator! Lots of good bits about Charles Schwab! Enrico Caruso! Abe Lincoln!
None of these people had a computer, but what did they all have in common? They behaved like they were actually interested in other human beings first, and then pitched their ideas or products second.
Uh, I made this blog on a PC. So it’s a bit crap. Like real people. 
Great post Claire and it really resonated with me!
One of my earliest jobs was in selling newspaper advertising. As a person who is painfully, genetically shy, greeting each new client sent me into a panic. I can’t recall how I stumbled onto “How to Win Friends and Influence People” but it saved my life (top salesperson two years running) and, I believe, along with my marketing experience, greatly influenced my later career in nonprofit fund-raising.
It’s interesting too, that the more I learn about true “donor-centric” fund-raising – even from books 20some years old – I see how those lessons can be applied to social media and email fund-raising. Good communications (and manners) never die.
My favourite thing about Carnegie’s book is his little stories just like yours, how ‘Salesman X’ managed to land the deal with good conversation skills. It’s so true that manners are manners across mediums. This is why this book is still in print, I guess!